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She walked into his office and put a big stack of papers in front of him on his desk. He picked up the stack, turned it face down and started randomly flipping through them, pulling out the ones he sto During the height of the Great Patriotic War, Stalin is listening to the updates his marshals give him on the situation on the fronts When the meeting is over, Zhukov is the first one to step out.

Stalin's personal secretary, Poskrebyshev happens to hear Zhukov's outburst. Being the loyal servant to the cause, he immediately reports it to his boss.

Stalin orders A teacher asked her students to write an essay about " what would I do if I were CEO of a company" She notices one of the kids is just looking out the window.

So she askes him "Why are you not writing your essay? A married man had a sweet young thing of a secretary and decided to take her to dinner.

He called his wife to tell her that he had to "work late" and she said, "no problem. On the way home he noticed a huge hick The Boss asks his secretary for some paper Secretary: A4 paper right?

Boss: No, A for apple. My secretary reminds me of my wife. I was unbuttoning her blouse at lunch today when she said, "Remember, you have a wife.

What the fuck are Yuan? These three men went into business together and the first one said: "I put up sixty-five percent of the capital, so I'm the president and chairman of the board.

There was an American and a Russian arguing.. The beautiful secretary of the president of a bank goes on a sight-seeing tour with a very rich African king who was a very important client.

The client, out of the blue, suddenly asks her to marry him. Naturally, the secretary is quite taken aback. However, she remembers what her boss told her, So, she tries to think of a way to dissuade the businessman from wanting to marry her.

After a few minut Defense Secretary Shanahan briefed the President this morning. He told Trump that three Brazilian soldiers were killed in Afghanistan.

To everyone's amazement, all of the color ran from Trump's face, then he collapsed onto his desk, head in hands, visibly shaking. Finally, he composed himself and asked Shanahan, "Just exactly how many is a brazillion?

His lips quiver. His hands shiver. His eyes wells up. He is unable to speak. Health secretary is stunned. He never imagined that this event could affect But nothing happened.

When the post office was to sort out the boy's letter addressed to 'God, America', they decided to deliver it to President Donald Trump.

The President was impressed, touched and entertained by the boy's letter. He tol The Secretary General of the UN decides to set them a test.

He releases a rabbit into a forest, and each of them has to catch it. The FBI people go in. They place animal informants throughout the forest.

They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investiga That bird is so smart, Donald has already taught him to say more than two hundred words!

He doesn't really understand what they all mean. A young doctor was just setting up his first office when he was told by his secretary that there was a man that wanted to see him.

The doctor wanted to make a good first impression by having the man think he was successful and very busy. He told his secretary to show the man in.

At that moment, the doctor picked up the telephone and pretended to be having a conversation with a patient. The man waited until the "conversa Priest and the Camera Twice a week the local parish priest liked to go up on the roof of the rectory and crank one out.

He had decided that this was probably the most discreet and secure place he could be and not be discovered.

One day a tourist on a nearby tower was taking pictures of the city landscape and noticed the I'm going to hire a secretary based on ability, not looks, this time.

I just need someone who can answer phones while I'm banging the hot one. I'm a doctor, and my old secretary was a cannibal. She always ate clients in the waiting room, and one day I caught her in the act.

I fired her then. For the longest time, she was trying my patience. Girl: I don't know, I've never been paperclipped.

A man sees an ad in the paper for a Big Dick club. He decides he wants to join, so he goes to the next meeting. In the small village the 5G transmitter was built.

Some time after building, the villagers started being angry about it. Soon, they made a petition against it. A secretary comes to the director of the project to inform him about the whole situation.

Most people don't know that Adam Smith was caught up early on in the metoo movement, when he was accused of groping his secretary.

But he insisted it was just the invisible hand How can you tell your blonde secretary is having a bad day? Her tampon is behind her ear and she can't find her pencil.

An important business man needs to find a new secretary and HR gives him three candidates from who he must chose To do this he asks the three girls the same question, "if I gave 1.

The second girl sa At a news conference, a journalist said to the politician running for the presidency, "Your secretary said publicly that you have a small penis.

Would you please comment on this. Arnold Schwarzenegger joined an Easter egg hunt but didn't find any eggs. His secretary asks "Does this mean you hate Easter now?

Amazed by the stunning beauty of their new secretary, two corporate executives resolved to make her adjustment to her new firm their personal business An employee was leaving the office late one evening when he found the CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.

Can you make this thing work? He turned the machine on, inserted the paper and pressed the start button. A political assassin, a cabinet secretary, and a narcissist walk into a bar A political assassin, a cabinet secretary, and a narcissist walk into a bar.

The bartender says, "The usual, Mrs. A man calls his secretary A man calls his secretary, but the call goes to his boss instead. Get ur lazy ass up and bring me a damn coffee!

I am the manager of this company! Furthermore, I own this entire buildi Stalin's secretary hears one of his generals say "mean Mr Moustache" She quickly runs into Stalins office and reports the words.

Stalin thanks her, and calls for the general to be brought to him. When the general arrives, Stalin sits him down and asks "I've received a report you said 'mean Mr Moustache'; is that correct?

Years ago I used to work as a secretary for the mafia. I was involved in very organized crime. Three men meet a weird car salesman.

Three men, childhood friends, are looking to get new cars. They travel to an odd-looking dealership. They approach the salesman.

Salesman: Greetings, gentlemen. How may I help you today? The respond that they want new cars. Why didn't the dentist ask his secretary out?

He was already taking out a tooth. What does a Boss and a diaper have in common? They are always on your ass and always full of shit. What do you call the fastest assistant in the world?

Husband: Why are you home so early? Secretary: My boss told me to go to hell. What do you call a South American secretary who is always in a hurry?

Once I got to our floor Mr. Park walked out of the meeting room angrily and the clients left the room quickly and pushed past me and into the elevator that just opened.

I quickly walked to my desk and turned on my computer. I was trying to finish the presentation notes for the Japanese clients for the next meeting.

I stood before slowly moving my way into his office. The door closed hard behind me making the room seem more cold and dark than usual because of all the blinds being closed and the only light coming from the main window behind Mr.

My fucking laptop. Especially to men who know my father. That little stunt we had to pull to make it seem somewhat less of a mistake could cost millions.

Keep reading. Me: the actors of this show I love. Mom: they look hot.

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Chitkabrey - Boss Harrasses Secretary

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Technical Specs. Plot Summary. Plot Keywords. Parents Guide. External Sites. User Reviews. User Ratings. External Reviews.

Metacritic Reviews. Photo Gallery. Trailers and Videos. Crazy Credits. Alternate Versions. Rate This. A young woman, recently released from a mental hospital, gets a job as a secretary to a demanding lawyer, where their employer-employee relationship turns into a sexual, sadomasochistic one.

Director: Steven Shainberg. Added to Watchlist. From metacritic. Top 5 "Bob's Burgers" Parody Episodes.

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Nominated for 1 Golden Globe. Edit Cast Cast overview, first billed only: James Spader Grey Maggie Gyllenhaal Lee Holloway Jeremy Davies Peter Lesley Ann Warren Joan Holloway Stephen McHattie Burt Holloway Patrick Bauchau Twardon Jessica Tuck Tricia O'Connor Oz Perkins Jonathan Amy Locane Lee's Sister Mary Joy Secretary: You're going to have to jack off because I have a headache.

Password A female secretary was helping her new boss set up his computer and asked him what word he would like to use as a password to log in with.

Wanting to embarrass his new secretary a bit and let her know where they stood, he smugly told her to enter 'dick.

Good First Impression A young doctor was just setting up his first office when his secretary told him there was a man to see him.

The doctor wanted to make a good first impression by having the man think he was successful and very busy. He told his secretary to show the man in.

At that moment, the doctor picked up the telephone and pretended to be having a conversation with a patient. The man waited until the "conversation" was over.

The temp shook her head and replied, "With 'pleasure' Why I fired my secretary Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on that morning.

I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday! As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone "Happy Birthday.

What's the difference between a good secretary and a personal secretary? One says "Good morning, boss! The other says " It's morning, boss!

A year old boy came home with a Porsche. His parents began to yell and scream. The secretary of defense entered Donald Trump's office. He told Donald Trump that a drone strike in South America had killed 4 brazilian people.

He expected Trump to take this lightly, but much to his surprise, Trump's face turned white with shock, and he promptly fainted.

After Trump awoke, the secretary of defense said "I didn't know you A guy comes home from work and he is clearly upset.

His wife looks concerned and asks him what's wrong. He shakes his head and refuses to say anything.

Later, during dinner, he's just pushing his food around on his plate and staring out the window. I've never seen you like this before," the wife says.

A man is having an affair on his wife with his secretary One day after work they lose track of time while making love in his office.

In a panic the man exclaims he must get home now or else his wife will surely know. Worried, the secretary asks what he will say.

The man has an idea, and tells her to take his shoes outside and rub them in the grass while h Why did I get divorced?

Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids. I went to work and even my colleagues didn't wish me a happy birthday.

As I entered my office, my secretary said, "Happy birthday, boss! A woman walks in on her husband performing anal sex on his secretary.

A crusty old man walks into the local Lutheran Church and says to the secretary, "I would like to join this damn church. I must have misunderstood you.

What did you say? I said I want to join this damn church! Secretary walks into the President's room Secretary: Mr.

President, Hurricane Florence is causing trouble. Trump: Offer her the same deal as Stormy Daniels. A married man was having an affair with his secretary One day, their passions overcame them in the office and they took off for her house.

Exhausted from the afternoon's activities, they fell asleep and awoke at around 8 p. As the man threw on his clothes, he told the woman to take his shoes outside and rub them through the grass and dirt.

Husband's 19 year old secretary A woman finds a note from her husband on the fridge one morning. I am very happy with you and I value you as a good wife.

Therefore, after reading this letter I hope that y General secretary Gorbachev is going by car to a meeting. Suddenly, his driver hits a pig near a small village and stops the car.

How is the new secretary? Wife: How is the new secretary? Husband: Ok Wife: How does she dress? Husband: Quickly. A man nervously dialed the office of his attorney.

He's dead. How to fire an Employee All the members of the company's Board of Directors were called into the Chairman's office, one after another, until only Ted, the junior member, was left sitting outside.

Finally it was his turn to be summoned. Ted entered the office to find the Chairman and the other four Directors s A psychiatrist's secretary walked into his office and said, "There's a gentleman in the waiting room asking to see you.

Claims he's invisible. I caught my Boss having sex with his secretary in his office "Close the door! The Baptists wondered where they could find water.

The Quakers quietly praised God for the blessings that fire brings. The Lutherans posted a notice on the door announcing the fire was evil.

The Roman Catholics passed the plate to cover the cost of the The top executives of the Budweiser beer company decide they need a fresh, new marketing initiative.

One suggests that the Catholic church, being a well known, global brand just like themselves, would be a suitable sponsorship partner, so they send two of their most persuasive directors to Rome.

They are granted an audience with the Pope and explain that they want a commercial link-up with the Vatican. This would, of course, involve some careful 'product placement'.

What they suggest is that the words in the Lord's prayer , 'Give us this day our daily bread', be replaced with, 'Give us this This joke was stolen from Ronald Reagan.

One day, an order went out to the police departments in the Soviet Union that anyone caught speeding, anyone, no matter who, gets a ticket. One day, the General Secretary was late leaving his country home to get to Moscow.

He runs up to his limousine and tells the driver to get in the back, and that A blind guy Dale goes to a lumber yard looking for a job. Once he finds the freemans office he introduces himself and asks for a job.

The foreman Greg is unsure how a blind guy can work at a lumber yard and expresses his concerns. Dale explains that bind people usually have heightened senses in the other areas.

In his case his sense of smell is extra keen. Greg tells him Dale that he doesn't understand how that wi At a winery, the regular taster died and the director started looking for a new one to hire.

A drunkard with a ragged, dirty look came in to apply for the position. The director of the winery wondered how to send him away.

He gave him a glass to drink. Low grade, but acc Pedro gets a New Secretary. The New Secretary Mr Robinson hired a new secretary.

She was young, sweet and very polite. While taking dictation one morning she noticed that Mr Robinson's fly was open. Upon leaving the room she said "Mr Robinson, your barracks door is open.

A girl and her mom are in a car. Girl: "Why is my name Rose? Who is Black Panther's Secretary of State? Wakandaleezza Rice. Whats you father's occupation?

Asked the school secretary, filling in the forms at the start of the academic year. What's his favorite trick? Now, next question.

Any brothers or sisters? A large multinational company puts out an application for a secretary. A golden retriever applies for the job, passes the written test and is scheduled for an interview.

At the interview the interviewer asks, "Can you speak any foreign languages? However much, you can bet you'd get your MoneysWorth.

My boss told be there would be a training seminar about sexual innuendo in the workplace and asked me to invite my secretary.

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